Which is the most important circle?

Which circles have most influence on the others? Where does life flow from and where does it go to? Is it from the inside circle, the spirit that life flows out through the heart and mind then changing our physical behaviour and what we say (functions of the body)? Is it our mind which changes us? What about the importance of helping one to change their behaviour and thus change their mind? What about changing the neuro chemical imbalance of someone who is depressed, which then changes their other circles including their social and spiritual experiences? So is it from the outside-in that change occurs, or from inside – out?

• Some would say we live from the inside to the outside. It is the heart which determines activities which involve our physical circle such as what we say and do. It is the type of plant which defines the flower or the fruit. It is the foundation which is more important than the building. It is the type of animal which is more important than the skin it wears (Jesus talked about wolves in sheep's clothing (Mt 7:15). The cleanliness of the inside of the cup is more important than the outside. Faith is more important than works. It is third spring which produces the water outflow, rather than vice versa. There may be some effect the outer circles have on inner ones, but the net balance, or the overall direction of influence is from the inside to the outside.
• Others say that the outside circles are really the important ones, which have more power and affect over the inner ones. It is the action and works which shows what your faith is. It is your experience which will determine who you become and what you believe. If someone who has had a domineering parent raise them up amount, they are more likely to see God in that way.

In reality, each circle has an influence on the others. The sequence of change in a person and the significance of one circle over another can be either centrifugal (moving inwards) or centripetal (moving outwards). In everyday life, the sequence and order is all over the place. The arrows of influence fly in all directions from one part of one circle to another part of another circle and so on. All of the circles are important and all of them have been made by God. However, the central circle, the spirit does take preference over the peripheral circles.

• In a healthy life living in the top right hand quadrant of the square, change occurs from the inside-out. The centre of rotation is from the middle circle, the spirit. Like wheels of a car, the other circles rotate in a stable way already balanced.
• When one lives a self-centred life, then the centre of rotation moves to off centre, from the spirit to any part of the other circles which is dominant at the time. So functions of the mind such as feelings of anger or even excitement can take over control. Physical and behavioural habits can dominate over one's life. The power of peer pressure in the social circle is not easy to get away from.

So do we live inside-out, outside-in, or both?

Currently, our people are living predominately from the centre of their lives - their spirit and personality/heart. A life of Christian wholeness is moving towards living predominately from the inside - out. It is from the inside that we live, move and have our being. The spirit is the centre and the anchor. It is the foundation, the spring and tree of life from which comes living water and healthy fruit. What comes out is evidence of what is on the inside. As one grows more toward Christian wholeness and maturity, then the spirit becomes more and more the centre of rotation than the other circles. The being preceeds and underlies the doing. Relationships are more important than tasks, and indeed sustain their activities. The organism (relational functioning) of any church is more important than the organisation (administrative and business structure). The great commandment (emphasising loving relationship between God, others and oneself) comes before and leads into the great commission (to go and do the tasks of mission and evangelism). Faith (inside) is expressed by works (outside).

In this book, as we go through the various circles, we will move from inside to out. In the other book which focuses on our people about five years ago when they were not going well, then the order of the circles is from the outside to the inside. This is because the actual change process in the counselling context generally starts from the outside and moves in. When someone who is wanting to change and comes to counselling, then usually they come and start by showing you what is on the outside first. It is only when there is safety, openness and trust at heart level that they invite you into their innermost parts of what is going on in the inside. The initial direction for change in counselling is thus one from outside to in. Once there at the heart of the matter, with them - really with them - then the internal changes can occur. These changes then come outwards through the rest of their parts, influencing their attitudes, and behaviours. Life then again takes on the healthy and predominant flow of change from the inside to out.

So, there are restrictions, limitations and problems with categorising the parts of the person. However, in order to understand someone and their journey as a whole, it is important to know their parts. When you ask a friend, someone in the family or in your small group, "How are you?", "Where are you at?", “What is that like for you?" you will be able to locate which circles they are talking about and how deep they are letting you in to their life. Don't go further or deeper than they let you. So we are a unity, we are: -

• One: A unity
• Two: Inside and outside
• Three: Body, soul and spirit
• Four: Body, mind, personality and spirit
• Five: Body, mind, personality, spirit and social
• All of the above!

The three colours of the circles.

There are three different colour brushes which are painted over the circles. These provide a colour change, while retaining the outlines. The three brushes are gender, culture and age (or development). Like different colour paints, they run into each other, and produces unique patterns and interactions. We will consider development after we have had a look at the circles, and see how the colour of the circles change as a person grows older.